Fucking Florida
two times in a four block radius I’ve had to honk my horn at dumbass drivers
my dad 30 seconds ago

i’m surprised no one has sent this to us yet

Re: the piss and shit bottle- it's called Jenkem. It's not actually a thing from Florida, but it still sounds like a Florida thing.

okay thank you for clarifying what the fuck dude

charmandurrrrr:

Today I learned that people in Florida invented this thing where you shit and piss in a bottle and then put a balloon on the top to collect the methane gas as it all ferments and then you get high on the methane gas and I was not in the least bit surprised

??????????????????

What's Florida weather like around Thanksgiving? I'll be going to Harry Potter World with my family during that time. Thanks!
Anonymous

Just to rub it in all of your faces I will be there THIS WHOLE WEEKEND HA HAAAAA

But to answer your question wow I cannot tell you what the weather will be like in 4 months, I can’t even tell you what the weather will be like in 4 minutes

So according to the BBC, someone in miami leaked the first five scripts to the new season of Doctor Who online when they were sent to the new latin american offices to get translated for spanish channels. Way to go Florida. I hope people are careful out there because you know....SPOILERS

LOL FLORIDA REALLY

SUMMER IN FLORIDA
Weather: HEY! HAVE SOME RAIN!!
Weather: YAY! MORE RAIN!
Weather: A FULL DAY OF NOTHING BUT RAIN!!
Weather: INTENSE THUNDER STORMS THAT TAKE OUT POWER!!!
Weather: RAIN MOTHERFUCKER!!!!
Weather: YOU KNOW, I HAVEN'T BEEN GIVING YOU ENOUGH RAIN!!
Weather: FUCKING WATER PARKS WORTH OF RAIN!!!
Weather: YOU SHOULD BE THANKFUL OF ALL THIS RAIN!!! YOU CAN SWIM IN YOUR FRONT YARD!!! HOW COOL IS THAT SHIT!!??

blushyarmin:

lordofthescience:

royaltyspeaking:

How to tell if it was a gunshot or fireworks: gunshots don’t echo, fireworks do. 

thaNK YOU SO MUCH

the fact that anyone might commonly need to know this terrifies me

Lol

I have a very important question, do you know where Port St. John is? Have you even heard about it? I just feel like it's this little hell hole that no one knows about.
Anonymous

i live like 20 minutes from port st. john and that place is AWFUL

Does anyone have advice for the Driving Test? I live in Orlando and I have been quite anxious about it

dont forget your blinkers when doing your 3 point turn and parking. those are the only things i forgot doing it lol. its suuuuuper simple, just dont stress about it and you’ll do fine!

What part of Florida do you live in?
Anonymous

as seen on our about page, we live in merritt island, orlando, and clearwater

Does Rick Scott even lift?
Anonymous

He lifts a ton

…of wawa and starbucks coffee BRAH

I was lol'ing over this blog when a bolt of lightning hit my apartment building and knocked out the power. Florida.
Anonymous

Typical

it’s raining and i’m pretty sure someone is setting fireworks off in my neighborhood what a time to be alive

i somehow forgot about this tweet i made last night

i somehow forgot about this tweet i made last night