Fucking Florida
my girlfriend was working at the desk of this hotel in central florida when they received a call from a guest who JUST checked in that there was a GATOR in their room. She went up like "wtf?" and it was.. a gecko. Like a 5" long gecko. And the woman was freaking out going "eww! what's it do!" and my gf's like "it crawls on stuff and eats bugs n stuff" and the dad was laughing with his son while video taping my girlfriend chase it behind the couch and emerge with it hanging from her ear lobe lol
Anonymous

THE ULTIMATE FLORIDIAN ACCESSORY: LIVE GECKO i mean ALLIGATOR EARRINGS yes such a classic pastime

one time i was at disney and there was a snake and captain hook and peter pan jumped on goofy and donald duck and they all fell down and went screaming and cinderella came over and stomped it with her high heel
Anonymous

Yes you go Cinderella show them boys what those heels are really for

No so I work at Disney and the other day a fucking giant bug flew into the castle and Captain Hook smacked it with his shoe and we thought it was dead and later it reared it's ugly head so Peter Pan went at it with shoe spray and hair spray and Prince Charming cut it's head off and for whatever reason we KEPT IT and it was still fucking twitching for HOURS after it was killed and like, we even tried crushing it and it still writhed and basically "Spider wasps" are not something to fuck with.
Anonymous

That was an amazing story

keepingupwthecanadians:

Pond hockey level: Florida

i just spotted a cockroach the size of fucking jupiter in my house send help

I found one in my bathroom and one on top of my bedroom door and we got one of them but the other ran behind my bed and let’s just say I’m sleeping in my brother’s room tonight because I fucking hate roaches :-)

are any of you going to warped tour?

elle is going to orlando and i’m trying to go as well but i dont think i’m going to be able to afford it lol

spotted in orlando. maaaaaybe a little much? 

spotted in orlando. maaaaaybe a little much? 

awesome

awesome

Hey there! "NASA Anon" here with unfortunate news. Tonight's launch of the Delta IV rocket from the Cape has been scrubbed. There seems to be a problem with a fueling/cooling system on the launch pad. Team Cape will work their hardest to fix it, and hopefully launch tomorrow (Thursday) evening at 6:59pm. At this time, weather is 30% favorable. I'll be back of anything changes!
Anonymous

that’s a bummer. :( hopefully it goes up tomorrow, thanks for the update! :*

Nass anon hint - I went to CHS with one of the mods I think??
Anonymous

Do you mean “THE REAL CHS” aka clearwater high? Oh hot damn this is funny ok ok give me another hint

I appreciate it greatly that you guys enlighten people on Florida's insanity as well as save animals lives Bless y'all
Anonymous

gotta look out for our furry friends they are important

I'm sure you've been asked before but I didn't see it in the FAQ, do you know of any blogs like this for other states/ places?

none that are updated regularly, there’s fuckingminnesota that liked to flirt with us or s/t but I don’t know what happened to them lol

My friend's hometown in Georgia has roads for their golf carts and even places like walmart and Target has parking spots specifically for them. Kids can drive them at 15 so they'll drive their golf cart to school and everything. It's Peachtree, GA

I mean Georgia is pretty much an extension of Florida but let’s hope we don’t get any ideas (also your URL is fucking rad I love Mae)

hey hey hey

hey hey hey

my grandfather rides around the city in a golf cart but he also has it pimped out and he attatched his own horn that sounds like a train its v loud and frightening

I don’t know of too many other places on earth that have whole cities that are basically devoted to golf carts and their uh eccentric drivers